31 months ago I moved to England to be w/ my best friend. The friend that a few months earlier while I was over visiting asked me if I wanted to move over for ‘awhile’. AWHILE?? So he wanted me to give up my job and move to a different country for ‘awhile’. I told him sure I’d love to move over but it wouldn’t be for ‘awhile’. I asked him if he was certain because once I was here I wouldn’t be going back. So I went back to the US and started making arrangements to head on over. We had GRAND plans– travel, drinking, travel and drinking, some more travel.

27 months ago I received a phone call from my mother. She had a dream that I was pregnant. I laughed at her. I had just that very day gotten my period. I had just that very day started my new job. NO WAY I was pregnant. Wal and I were going out that night to celebrate my becoming a contributing member of society. Lots of drinking was done that night. Lots of laughing. Life was good, it was exactly what I had hoped it would be when I boarded that plane. I was with my best friend and damn it was good.

26 months ago I nervously told Wal I had missed my period. 26 months ago I drove him to the airport as he left for a 10 day business trip w/ his words ringing in my ears. He wanted to ‘take care of it’. We weren’t ready. I had just arrived. We weren’t married. Maybe I was just late. We would talk about it when he got back. 26 months ago I called my best friend Wendy and cried and cried and cried. I told her the line was very faint– maybe it was wrong. She laughed and explained if there was a line to be seen I was pregnant. I explained to her Wals reaction. She reassured me that it was normal. That he would come around. That it would be ok. So I sat in my empty house with this thing growing in my tummy. Going to work with a nervous buzz– I think it was stress. 26 months ago Wal came back from his trip and we talked and talked. 26 months ago we decided that although the timing was off, that we hoped we’d have a couple of years enjoying ourselves that what was done was done. Yippee, can you hear the joy in our voices? I called my mom and asked if she remembered calling me the month before and her telling me her dream. I explained to her that her dream had come true. She was pleased. She laughed and told me I should ALWAYS listen to her– she knows everything! HA!

I suffered through 9 months of mild/moderate morning sickness and abdominal pain– I have fibroids and I think Squidge was kick boxing with them. 20 weeks into my pregnancy I found out the sex of the baby. I called my mom and aunt Liliana and told them I was having a girl. My aunt Liliana started crying– I started crying– hormones. I suffered through 9 months of ‘discussions’ with Wal– we couldn’t decided what to name ‘peanut’ ( I know how original). I thought we would come to blows– I wanted to beat the crap out of him w/ the nearest pillow– hormones. I liked Isabella. He liked Isobel. I HATED Isobel and he HATED Isabella. Do you see the deep chasm between us growing? Finally FINALLY 2 weeks before she was born we came to a name we both likedloved. I had seen a program on TV and a little girl named Esme. Wal was out of town and I sent him a text. Esme. His reply was– yes. I almost fell off the sofa. I called him and explained to him what I meant. He explained to me that yes he understood and he liked the name. WOW! Really?? Is that it?? After months and months of arguing we FINALLY found a name we both loved. Not one we were settling for. We had decided we both didn’t hate the name Samantha. Not a bad name but I didn’t want to settle on a name I didn’t hate. I wanted a name I loved. So peanut finally had a name.

17 months ago my mother arrived a week after my due date. I thought I’d surely have had Squidge by then! She was here for 7 days. 4 days into her stay and Squidge didn’t look like she was planning on arriving before vavo left. We booked in for an induction and Squidge arrived during the world cup. She conveniently arrived between games. My mom left 2 days later.

17 months ago I was left w/ the baby. I was the mother– WTF!! I have never wanted children. Or if I did think I wanted them they were a vague obscure want way out in the future. I was too busy doing what I did. Children were loud, demanding, cramped your style. I had had 9 months to convince myself that my life wouldn’t change all that much. We could still travel, drink, drink and travel. About 3 days after my mother left and Wal was at work I sat there breasts leaking, breath stinking holding this being in my arms as she cried. She was hungry? No. She was wet? No. She was hot/cold? No. I didn’t know what I was doing. Wal didn’t know what he was doing. Poor Squidge I thought– we’re completely incompetent. She was going to grow up a stunted, stupid, malnourished little thing. About 3 months into this mummy gig I realized that I was doing it. I was breastfeeding this little baby and she was still here. She wasn’t dead.

I was keeping her alive all.by.my.self. THAT was a mind blowing realization. Silly but still mind blowing. Today Squidge is 17 months old. SEVENTEEN MONTHS! She has turned my life upside down. She has made me so much less selfish. She makes my day when she looks at me and laughs when she farts– I absolutely love that!!! We don’t travel as much as we would like. I’ve had to readjust my perception of myself. We get frustrated and upset and still at times think we’re young (ppfff) and carefree. Whenever we feel like that Squidge will walk up to one of us and hug our neck. She’ll pull the laptop off the coffee-table or she’ll headbutt us. She’ll take our half empty cup of tea and tip it over. Carefree has never felt so good. There are soo many things I’m looking forward to. Skiing w/ Squidge and baking Christmas cookies w/ Squidge are just a couple of them. She laughs and runs and cries and throws a tantrum and is a royal pain in the ass but we wouldn’t have any other way.

I’ll post photos of Squidge in all her teething glory tomorrow!

B is helping Squidge decorate her tiara. 

 still decorating

FOOD!!

Vintage Mini’s and racecar fairy!

What’s everyone looking at?  Is my tutu stuck in my nappy or something?!!?!

And now to the bandit part of this post.  Look what I found when I looked out the window on Saturday night!  Yep some poor waitress came out to find this had happened to her car.  I called the police and they pushed it back onto all 4 wheels.

Firstly Squidgyboo is now both a US citizen and a British citizen. We had to apply for discretionary citizenship for her here in the UK because Simon and I aren’t married and citizenship passes through the Mom. So after sending them 200 pounds we got a nice certificate and it’s all nice and official, YAY!!

On the 7th I went to London w/ Squidgyboo to get her passport and get something called a ‘Consular Report of Birth Abroad of a citizen of the USA’ and her SSN. We took the train down from Manchester, then from Euston station we got on the tube to the US Embassy. It was a georgous day so the trip was very nice. Squidgyboo was a really good girl and only cried a little bit. Poor thing was very tired so I don’t blame her for crying. We left the house @ 6am and were back by 4pm. It was a very long day and the two of us took a nice long nap when we got home.

Wallywoo is still away. He left a week ago yesterday and won’t be back until Monday possibly even Tuesday. I’m hoping he’s back on Monday because we miss him lots!! I know that we would much rather be home and doesn’t really like these long trips. He would much rather do his usual 2–3 day trips but his boss is travelling w/ him. His boss lives in the US so because of that these trips are usually longer.

Squidgyboo and I are leaving on Thursday for our holiday in the Azores!! We are very excited and are really looking forward to seeing vovo and vôvô!! I’m hoping travelling alone will not be too bad. Wallywoo booked our flights and he made sure there was enough time between flights to calm her down, feed her and generally not be too stressed. Wallywoo will be meeting us later, he is going to be in the US for a meeting for the first week. Our tickets arrived yesterday so we just need to pack!!

Scary thing happened to us last Thursday, we had a home invasion. 4 men wearing ski masks kicked our door in looking for the keys to the car. Wallywoo fought them off!! Who would have thought he had it in him. He has a black eye, bruised ribs and was taken to the hospital just as a precaution. I screamed my head off and am completely traumatized by the entire incident!! Apparently these types of incidents are more and more common. With security on the cars being better the theives need the keys in order to steal it. So what do they do?? They just bust down your door and expect you to be too shocked to resist. I haven’t slept a wink since it happened, I keep thinking they’re going to come back!! Wallywoo and are were planning on moving but this is just speeding up the process. I’m hoping to be in a new place by Christmas, I fear this is wishful thinking! I’ll keep everyone posted if they catch the bastards!! We had the car taken away and dusted for fingerprints, hopefully they found something.

We spent the weekend in Shrewsbury with Wallywoo’s old college friend and his family. We had a vey good time and Squidgyboo was very good. We went into the village to watch fireworks and she slept through the entire thing! Of course she woke up as soon as they were orver! She’s able to keep her head up more and has a lot more control of it. She looks like a little turtle sometimes. I’ll post some more pictures when I have a second!! She’ll be 2 months in a few days. I can’t believe how quickly time is passing.

Here’s a picture of Squidgyboo wearing her new strawberry sweater sent to her by her Madrinha Maryann!! It’s just a little BIG!!!!